Feeling: synergetic. Just “jinxed” Salma Hayek in Fool’s Rush In while she spiels on a cliff top in the Grand Canyon. Wow, a hot dog looks terrif right now. How the HELL did a little Mexican girl get one shipped piping hot from New York to Vegas in 1991??

Urges: to restrict [but I followed my breakfast plan] to binge/purge [but I followed my breakfast plan] to binge/purgerestrictrestrictrestrictbinge/purge [but I followed my breakfast plan and things just got easier throughout the day. No, not easier…things just continued after I followed my breakfast plan and didn’t get interrupted by fuck-ups.

Behaviors: body-checking…probably a lot. I’ve been eating without purging and dragging ass on slow nights @TTown – how could I not be a house? I definitely feel like one and am over-justifying, catastrophizing, and finding myself completely consumed by this feeling. I need to check. I really want to find my strings and compare circumfrances. Circumfranci. Circumfranyou. I also really want to order a hot dog from New York. And I’m thinking it would be wise to get my eating down to a consistent, reliable plan lest I really eff things up.

Challenged by: acknowledging hunger or interest in food in front of people. Feeling compelled to bounce on any and all social opportunities after an evening of feeling totally “off.”

Valued/Learned: my conversation, however staggered and un-polished, with Bill the Biker…who drank a pint of Johnny Blood and came back after a nap @the Holiday Inn for an elk burger and a glass of water. I want to be able to bike coast-to-coast across a country when I retire. …sooner would be great, but I I’d like to bank on being at a place in my life where I can do exactly that. Also, perspective is everything. …and is completely subjective. Duh.

Positive: tomorrow is my last day of work before DC :)